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Course 406 - Theology of Work

Course 406 - Theology of Work (3 credits) This course will look at the theology of work and how work fits into ministry and God’s Kingdom.

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Mentoring Troubled Children (Denise Cromwell 05-06)

Member Name: Denise Cromwell

Project Description:

In this presentation, Denise Cromwell describes the principles which guided her as she started a mentoring ministry to troubled children at her service site.

To help kids listen to rock more critically

To help kids listen to rock more critically.

OVERVIEW

LEADER PREPARATION

Obtain the following items for the session:

  • A few songs that clearly contain different messages (about sex, violence, rebellion, message, love, feelings, etc.).
  • Cassette tapes or CDs, cued to songs
  • Cassette and/or CD player
  • Index cards
  • Pens or pencils

GROUP BUILDING

Use either of the activities described below:

"To Tell the Truth." Each participant writes down the following information on an index card: name, favorite group, favorite song, least favorite group, and least favorite song. Ask for three volunteers; collect their cards. Read one of their cards aloud (do not reveal whose card it is). The rest of the group may ask questions (for 2-3 minutes) of the three volunteers to determine whose card was read. All are trying to convince the group that it is their card (one is truthful; the other two are only persuading). After a few minutes of interrogation, have group vote on who they think it is. Ask the person who really wrote the card to reveal him- or herself. Repeat the activity as desired.

"Name that Tune." Play 2 seconds of a pop song from the radio, a cassette tape, or CD. Have the program participants raise their hands to answer the following questions: Who is singing? (1 point); Name of song? (1 point); What is name of the album or CD? (2 points). The first person to answer correctly continues answering until he or she is incorrect. Then choose next person to continue until all 4 points are scored for each song. Use as many songs as time allows.

GROUP DISCUSSION

Explain that the group will listen to and give feedback on rock music. Emphasize that they—not you—will discuss the music. Ask them to listen carefully to all aspects of the song; they may take notes as they listen. Play a few currently popular rock songs. Ask the following discussion questions: they can either answer the questions aloud or write them down and discuss later.

  • Who sings the song?
  • What do the lyrics say?
  • Have you ever really listened to the words before?
  • What values are communicated through the song?
  • Do you agree with these values?
  • How do these lyrics affect you and your values?
  • Is it alright to listen to this kind of music? Why or why not?
  • How does music fit into your life?

WRAP-UP

  • Ask the group what they have learned. Get several different perspectives.
  • Leave them with some questions to consider as they listen to music: Why do you like rock music? How does it affect your life? Are there changes you need to make in the way you listen?

EVALUATION AND FOLLOW-UP

  • Regularly, but not too often, continue to ask kids about music. Such inquiry will reinforce critical listening in kids. Individually discuss with kids in your group about how their critical listening technique is working.
  • This discussion is specifically designed for a small youth group. However, it could be used in a large group or a less-structured overnight (formalized or spontaneous) setting. It might also be suitable in a classroom setting.

IMPLICATIONS

  • Music is a significant part of adolescents’ lives. This exercise provides the opportunity for leaders to discuss, understand, and help kids deal with this significant influence.
  • The youth worker should aim to open lines of communication with kids on the charged issue of music. Do not "preach" to them or even try change them; instead, give them skills that they can use to critically evaluate and process the lyrics they hear in rock music.
cCYS


AT-RISK YOUTH OVERVIEW

AT-RISK YOUTH OVERVIEW

(Download At-Risk Youth overview as a PDF)


We have put most of our information on this topic under "Troubled Youth." Our online Encyclopedia is filled with topics which are a part of this issue (e.g., "Eating Disorders," "Depression," "Suicide," "Homicide").

It is important to think of the assets of youth before considering their problem sides. A national youth organization, during the Black Power days of the early 1970s, was courageous enough to publish a picture on the front page of its monthly magazine, the picture of a young African American with the title: " ‘I’m not a problem; I’m a man.’ " The problem side of youth should never be our first or main concern; too often teenagers are seen in negative terms. Negative insinuations about young people are carried in humor, and the many adult jokes, from Mark Twain on, affect relationships between young and older people.

We define youth (or adolescence) as the period between childhood and adulthood. It is therefore important to define and describe childhood (no longer the age of innocence but still an age of dependence) and adulthood (autonomy from parental financial and emotional support, clarity about personal identity including vocational choice, and readiness for intimacy with another and for parenting—although singleness can be just as mature a state as marriage). Youth no longer play adult games as children do; they are practicing adult relationships and vocations through peer groups, dating, school, and part-time jobs or service projects.

Urbanization brings a prolongation of youth or adolescence (through the demands of further education and the unavailability of full employment), a segregation by age groups, restrictions on what youth can do (in general, they are removed from adult responsibilities/power and life-and-death matters), and finally, confusing mixed messages from adults, a multiplicity of value systems, and seduction of media. In short, urban societies have created a more complex world, given youth more freedom of choice, confused them with double messages, titillated them with erotic insinuations, and extended the proper time for marriage. This is more than enough to place all youth at some risk.

Joy Dryfoos (1990, p. 107) divides youth into categories depending upon the level of risk they face. She describes very high-risk youth who make up 10 percent of the youth population (committing criminal offenses, dropping out of school, heavy smoking and use of alcohol, drug abuse, etc.). Those who participate at many of these high risk behaviors but with slightly lower frequency, she labels high- risk youth estimated at another 15 percent of the youth population. Moderate-risk youth are experimenters in risky behaviors, making up about one-fourth of the youth population; the rest, about half of all young people, are seen to be at low risk.

The Encyclopedia tends to use a more subjective but functional rule of thumb. Young people who are in immediate danger of doing serious injury to others (homicide) or to self (suicide) are seen at highest risk, then those who are less likely to do so but still need help, to those who are struggling through difficult situations or inner issues, to those who are mature leaders among their cohorts or peers.

The problem with all these analyses is that strong and seemingly mature youth, like the two candidates for U.S. military academies (and romantic couple) who murdered a girl with whom the boyfriend had had one-time sex. Their personal problems had been apparently hidden from others and themselves. With many others, including the teens who killed their newborn infants, they seem to be good kids doing terrible things. The complexity and mystery of human nature are such that we can never be sure. We try to understand risks and trouble in order to intervene appropriately, but none of our predictions or dogmatic diagnoses are absolute. We tentatively notice predictors and look for positive potential in every human being.

If a youngster grows up in a home in which the one parent (or both) smokes and one is an alcoholic, and if that kid begins to smoke at 10 or 11, gets drunk by 13 or 14, and finally if he or she begins to hang around with a crowd where marijuana is smoked, we can be pretty sure that they will be doing pot by the age of 17 and abusing more serious drugs soon after. Similarly, early sexual abuse, serial lovers in a home, and initial sexual experimentation in the early teens are strong predictors of sexual promiscuity, early pregnancy, and the acquisition of some sexually transmitted disease. Such young people at risk often have emotional sores and may have learning disabilities besides. Educational and vocational expectations are therefore lowered. Facing such dead-ends and social disapproval, drugs become self-medication, a temporary relief from inner rage or pain, as well as a bond to the only community which will accept them.

There is great reward in coming alongside such young people, learning about their friends and world (subculture), hearing their stories, establishing trust, and seeing the healing of hurts and dramatic growth in responsible living. Young people in recovery from troubled pasts are among the most effective peer counselors and agents of change. Society can’t afford to lose these valuable resources.

QUESTIONS FOR REFLECTION AND DISCUSSION

  1. What brought you to this topic? Who were your thinking of? What could they teach you about this whole issue?
  2. Did you find anything here helpful? What more are you looking for? Consider where you can find answers to a specific question in this Encyclopedia or elsewhere?
  3. How might your discussion of youth at-risk be different with a group of young people? With leaders or parents of young people? With experts in the field?

 

IMPLICATIONS

  1. Youth are a society’s most precious resource. Urban societies may be forgiven for making the transition to adulthood so difficult but will not be forgiven for being unresponsive to the negative consequences of such crises.
  2. For more on this topic be sure to refer to "Troubled Youth."
Dean Borgman cCYS


To help teens select suitable role models

To help teens select suitable role models.

OVERVIEW

In a world where values conflict and many homes have at least one absent parent, it can be confusing to find people who can positively model how to live. Teens need to learn how to clarify the traits that they value in role models and become aware that they themselves may be models for others. Raising this consciousness can help young people wisely select heroes.

LEADER PREPARATION

  • In the meeting prior to this discussion, suggest that kids bring magazine or newspaper clippings about their most admired person.
  • Find out what music groups are popular. Ask teens why they like those particular groups. Bring in some of these groups’ cassettes or CDs and select a few songs that represent what your kids like most about the groups. Read magazines or watch interviews to learn about each of their favorite groups.
  • Find a recent TV show or movie depicting a mentor-mentee relationship. Edit a few scenes from any such show to demonstrate a role model relationship. An alternative video suggestion is to edit some TV or movie clips of teens’ current heroes. In either case, make sure that a VCR and TV is available.
  • Bring some pens, paper, posterboard, scissors, and glue to the meeting.

GROUP BUILDING

  • If you have decided to have kids bring in clippings, cut and paste photos on one large posterboard. For kids who have no clippings, drawings can be added to the collage. The result will be a collective representation of their heroes.
  • Play "Charades." Have kids portray past or present heroes.

GROUP PRESENTATION

The goal of the presentation is to raise the group’s awareness of the values and lifestyles they espouse:

  • If a collage has been made, take note of the various types of people represented. Observe who their heroes are, and then ask, "What makes a hero a hero?" Ask other appropriate questions to find out common characteristics of heroes, why they chose who they chose, and what purposes heroes serve.
  • Play bits from the recorded song clips. Ask what makes the group popular (Lyrics? Sound of music? Group’s appearance? Values of the group? Where the group is from?). Find out why people in your group want to emulate the music groups’ values and lifestyles. By knowing more about the people presented, you will be able to communicate more effectively with the group, addressing congruities and inconsistencies in the group’s life or history.
  • If showing the TV and movie clips, point out the mentor-mentee relationship. Explain that it can be a positive or negative relationship. Ask the group what kind of relationships are they seeking.
  • Divide into small groups. Encourage the participants to each share with each other their heroes. Why did they select those heroes? Are these role models positive or negative influences? Why?

WRAP-UP

Share with the group one of your past or present heroes and tell them what you find valuable in that person.

EVALUATION AND FOLLOW UP

  • Talk to individuals in your group a few days after this discussion. What affected them about the program?
  • The following week, ask the group if they have anything to add to their list of admirable qualities in role models. Are they attempting to emulate any of these positive qualities?
  • Most importantly, be available to talk. Teens need help in clarifying the values of their role models and their own values.

Beth McCaw cCYS

The purpose of this session is to discuss why youth rebel

The purpose of this session is to discuss why youth rebel.

OVERVIEW

LEADER PREPARATION

  • Survey several young people about their respect of and obedience to authorities at school, at home, and in society.
  • Gather current statistics on crime, drug abuse, and sexual promiscuity.
  • Study some history on youth rebellion.

GROUP BUILDING

Show an excerpt from "Rebel without a Cause." Discuss with the group what makes rebellion appealing and glamorous. Ask the group to think of a personal recent expression of rebellion. Ask for volunteers to share their experiences. How did they feel afterwards? What were the results?

GROUP PRESENTATION

  • Play video clips of teenage rebellion. (For instance, use "Beavis and Butthead.")
  • Play music and highlight lyrics that encourage rebellion.
  • Share a personal experience of your own rebellion; show how it led to further complications.

GROUP DISCUSSION

Discuss any of the following questions:

  • Why do young people rebel?
  • Can you control your rebellious habits? How?
  • Is rebellion only a phase that one passes through during adolescence? When does the desire to rebel go away?
  • How do you overcome rebellious impulses and actions?

WRAP-UP

  • Encourage them to ask forgiveness for their rebellion. Explain that a part of genuine repentance is to seek reconciliation with those we have offended. Make sincere apologies, ask for forgiveness, and make reparations if necessary.
  • Remind them that life is about progress—not immediate perfection.

EVALUATION AND FOLLOW-UP

  • A few weeks after the program, discuss their progress.
  • Designate partners to keep one another accountable throughout the week.
  • Encourage the group to exercise biblical discipline with wisdom and gentleness.

IMPLICATIONS

  1. Youth leaders should provide a loving, attentive, disciplined environment.
  2. This discussion will reorient students to view rebellion as abnormal and wrong behavior.

Harold Kim cCYS



To describe two basic models of camping programs

 

To describe two basic models of camping programs.

OVERVIEW

There are two basic models of camping programs. The first, which is the more common and traditional model, is the centralized program. In this type of camp, a program director or committee organize the activities. Campers individually select those activities in which they want to participate.

The campers and counselors follow a pre-arranged schedule throughout the day. For example, the first activity may begin at 10:00 a.m. each morning and runs for an hour. At 11:00, the next activity begins. Lunch is at 12:30 p.m. The day flows smoothly and efficiently. This type of program has the ability to service a large number of campers. Also, counselors can specialize in one area of the program, such as music, water activities, or archery rather than having to know how to do everything.

The second model is decentralized. At a decentralized camp, the individual cabin counselor acts as a program director for his or her cabin group. The cabin group ranges anywhere between three to fifteen campers. This group develops a schedule together, corporately deciding what they will do throughout the day.

This method seems to capitalize on the "teachable moment." If a group of campers is at the lake and is catching a lot of fish, the counselor has flexibility to rearrange the schedule and let the campers fish longer. Or, if a camper should ask a question such as, "Why are there so many different types of birds?", the counselor can give a short lesson on birds without having to worry about missing the 12:30 lunch.

There are camps that try to combine the best of both formats. These camps use a pre-arranged schedule for such things as pool use, but allow flexibility into the schedule so that the counselor and his or her cabin may plan activities on their own. COMPARISONS OF BOTH MODELS

In a decentralized camping program, the counselors require a level of maturity to be able to self-initiate activities. The centralized program allows more direct supervision of the counselors.

Coordinating the use of facilities and equipment is difficult with decentralization. Also, the counselor and his or her cabin group may focus on a limited number of activities and miss other activities. The centralized program provides a balanced, well-rounded experience for each camper.

Individual needs of campers are more easily met in the decentralized program. Some campers may be overlooked in a centralized program during which everyone is expected to follow the same pre-arranged schedule.

The decentralized program allows more opportunities for campers to experience the democratic process in operation. In the combined model this element can be included. The success of the program and the camping experience depends more on the counselor in the decentralized program. If one counselor in the centralized program is not working effectively, the camper may still have a great week because of exposure to a number of other counselors.

IMPLICATIONS

  1. The stated purpose of most camps is to meet the needs of campers. Each of these camping models can accomplish this goal. Parents will inquire how the camp plans to meet the needs of their child.
  2. Youth workers planning a camping program for a group should consider the resources available to meet the needs that he or she is trying to meet. This will help the youth worker determine which approach to camping will best serve the campers.
  3. In either model, or in the combined model, the most important aspect of a successful camping program is the counselor. The counselor should love, nurture, and care for young people; be able to communicate well with them; and be comfortable with leading a group of young people. There must be a commitment to unconditional love for the all the kids in the program.

John L. Vershon III cCYS


The drama of the gifted child

Miller, A. (revised and updated, 1996). The drama of the gifted child.

New York City: Basic Books Inc.

/files/Images/Book covers/Drama of the gifted child.jpg

 

(Download this book review as a PDF)

 


This book is about teenagers who try to be perfect, "skillfully reflecting their parents expectations" (to an extreme). Sensing a restriction on expressing their true feelings, they can grow up with an underlying
sense of worthlessness. Repressed feelings can lead to depression and compulsive behaviors.


Can they be too good? Are they good for reasons other than great programming? Alice Miller, a German psychoanalyst, proposes that there are a whole batch of kids, particularly suburban kids, who are, in effect, approval junkies. They need approval and love, and are willing to work for it. And so their "good" behavior may be intentionally designed to get them the affirmation do not receive elsewhere. Alice Miller, in her book, The Drama of the Gifted Child, attempts to explain this kind of person. She identifies them as people who

 

According to prevailing, general attitudes...should have had a strong and stable sense of self-assurance. But exactly the opposite is the case. In everything they undertake they do well and often excellently; they are admired and envied; they are successful whenever they care to be-but all to no avail. Behind all this lurks depression, the feeling of emptiness and self-alienation, and a sense that their life has no meaning. These dark feelings will come to the fore as soon as the drug of grandiosity fails, as soon as they are not ''on top,'' not definitely the ''superstar,'' or whenever they suddenly get the feeling they failed to live up to some ideal image and measure they feel they must adhere to. Then they are plagued by anxiety or deep feelings of guilt and shame. (pp. 5-6)

Not surprisingly, as a psychoanalyst, she locates a source for this experience in the child''s early relationship with one''s parents, particularly his or her mother. She suggests that for a child to grow into a healthy, vibrant adult, the child must have the freedom to express his or her sensations, needs, and desires. The child must have the experience of, for a time, being the narcissistic center. According to Miller, this is vital to developing one''s healthy self-esteem. The importance of this "unconditional acceptance" is that it allows the child to know that he or she is loved for who he or she is and not what he or she does or offers to another. It allows the child to feel a sense of belonging and value.

This healthy narcissism is the basis for healthy self-esteem, the unquestioned certainty that the feelings and wishes one experiences are a part of one''s self; and that one is free to express these, irrespective of whether he or she will be loved or hated for it. This ideally happens in the child''s relationship with his or her parents.
Unfortunately, for parents to provide this healthy, accepting environment, they must be very secure in themselves and unselfish. If parents themselves have been narcissistically deprived, then they will be searching throughout their own lives for "the presence of a person who is completely aware of them and takes them seriously, who admires and follows them.....the most appropriate objects for gratification are a parent''s own children. A newborn baby is completely dependent on his parents, and since their caring is essential for his existence, he does all he can to avoid losing them." (pp.8-9)

So the child develops the ability to perceive and respond to the needs of the parents. This secures the love of the parent and guarantees the existence of the child. However, it leaves the child without accurate feedback as to how his or her self-expression impacts others. Generally, the child who is needed to affirm one''s parents is free to develop his or her intellect, but not his or her emotions, as the parent needs the emotional attention of the child.

Miller identifies three possible consequences for the child who makes this early adaptation to one''s parents:

  1. The impossibility of experiencing certain feelings (such as jealousy, envy, anger, loneliness, and anxiety) in childhood or in later adulthood. Emotions such as these may result, in the mind of a child, in isolation or abandonment by the parent, their only source of life. Since emotion may only be experienced in an atmosphere of acceptance, it is not experienced at all. Several defenses frequently accompany this loss of emotion such as "intellectualization" and behavior designed to "measure up" to projected standards.
  2. The development of a personality that is composed solely of what is expected of them. To minimize the risk of abandonment, they reveal only what is expected, and then assume that as an identity.
  3. The development of "bond permanence," the inability to operate apart from the expectations of significant others. The person "cannot rely on his own emotions, has not come to experience them through trial and error, has no sense of his own real needs, and is alienated from himself to the highest degree....he cannot separate from his parents, and even as an adult he is still dependent on affirmation from his partner, from groups, or especially from his own children" (p. 14). For the person who is in this state, the path to freedom lies in recognizing and mourning the loss of one''s childhood. That mourning may involve sadness, anger, depression, and making strong demands. In essence, it means going back and finding out if one is lovable when not "behaving." This is a frightening experience for one who believes that his or her existence depends on the approval of others. But it must happen if these people are going to develop healthy and vibrant lives.

Miller also suggests that once one child has taken the role of affirming the parent, other siblings are more free to develop unencumbered. Often it is the first child who carries this responsibility as parents are less confident and more needy of affirmation for their parenting with the first. The bulk of the book then discusses the process of therapy that takes place, and outlines the various stages and pitfalls of the therapeutic relationship.

 

QUESTIONS FOR REFLECTION AND DISCUSSION

  • Do you think a child or young person can be "too good?"
  • How might the membership of such a person(s) affect a class or youth group?
  • What could you do for yourself if you realize you are an "approval junky?"
  • As a leader or teacher, how would you relate to such a young person? What might you avoid and what might you, at the right time, suggest?
  • How might parents help to break such co-dependency or addiction to approval?

 

IMPLICATIONS

  • Within a Christian family, it is possible to communicate that a child is loved when they behave in a Christian manner. This is particularly true in light of the fact that one''s children''s faith may be taken as a reflection on the faith or righteousness of the parent. And so the child may first seek the approval of the parent, and then the Sunday school teacher, youth leader, parent, and finally God, by behaving properly and being good.
  • The ''good'' kids in one''s youth group may be approval junkies. They may be using their behavior as a way to get the affirmation they need. Even conversion can be for the sake of the youth leader and the resulting attention. This does not invalidate their faith, but it may mean that discipling them should take a different tone. They can and will memorize all kinds of Bible verses, bring new kids, and work on service projects-but for them this may be more of an exchange-like working for a paycheck-than expression of faith.
  • Youth ministers love it when kids respond to programs, talks, and calls to faith. These kids know we love it. They are experts at figuring what adults want and giving it to them. Youth leaders may be especially susceptible to developing co-dependent relationships with these kinds of kids. Everyone gets affirmed, but no one is set free to live in faith.

cCYS



Volunteer Opportunities: Mentoring

Title Organization Name City, State/Country
Short Term Missions Trinity Christian Community
New Orleans, LA
United States
Christian Consultant Coastland Consultants
Manchester, NH
United States
After School Tutor Dorchester H.E.R.C.
Mattapan, MA
United States
Choir Chaperone African Children's Choir
BC
Canada
Preschool aide and/or tutor Christian Appalachian Project
KY
United States
Guest care/Christian discipleship Volunteer Ashburnham Place
Battle
United Kingdom
Music Ministry / Team Dynamic Life Chapel
Ghana
After-School Tutoring Earthen Vessels Outreach
Pittsburgh, PA
United States
Group mission visitation Earthen Vessels Outreach
Pittsburgh, PA
United States
Construction work Aurora Primary School
Bapsfontein
South Africa
Title Organization Name
Pen Pal Christian Pen Pals
Reading Tutor for Elementary School Children --Belle Haven Elementary Reading Partners
Pen-pal writers Pass The Word Christian Outreach Ministry
Online Mentor TruthMedia
Grant-researcher/grant-writer Doll House Ministries
Accountant/Tax Planner Doll House Ministries
Tutor/GED Coordinator F.A.I.T.H. Ministries, Inc.
Grant/Proposal Writer Breakout! Youth Ministries Inc.
volunteering on the health care issues Arrow web hospital
Match Your Skills to Community Needs! Head hunting for volunteering DurhamCares
Postal Code

Audio: Mentoring